Personal Childhood Web

Grandma. To quote a younger me, "My grandma is the best grandma in the world." The reason I wrote that in a formal quote, is because it is the opening line from an award I gave Grandma Estelle while I was in the fifth grade. She honestly is the most wonderful person I have ever met.  All throughout my life, Grandma Estelle has literally, emotionally, and cognitively been my greatest support. Though she did not live in my home, she was never further than 5 miles away. From delivering forgotten lunches to school, to teaching me her famous butter cookie recipe, I knew, and still know, I can always count on her. As a reading specialist, Grandma emphasized the importance of enjoying the process of learning. Even when I struggled, she found ways to build my confidence. I contribute a major portion of my success directly to her. Even to this date, I can call her in tears, venting about struggles in my workplace, and know that she will always have the right words to brighten my perspective. I could go on for days all of the ways she motivates, inspires, and cares for me. Her heart is made of gold, and for that I am beyond grateful. 

Dad. Good old, Dad. He always finds ways to make me realize that I am not alone in my struggles. As a child, I struggled with believing in myself; especially with academics, as my two siblings truly are exceptional learners. I can remember the first time he made me feel important... I was in middle school, venting about how sad I was that I didn't have close friends. I felt lonely and isolated. We sat in the parking lot of the ice rink, waiting to head inside to watch my older brother's hockey game. As I began to cry, Dad did too. He told him how hard it was for him to make close friends as well. He shared some secrets of his past that affect him greatly, but also shared how he has overcome his struggles. At that moment, I realized that even without close friends, I had the best supporter anyone could ask for.

Jacqueline. Yes, when I was a child, I cried. A lot. It usually came from a situation that revolved around me not getting enough attention. My cousin, Jakky, always seemed to ignore my meltdowns. Even if it happened in the middle of a game of sharks and minnows in her backyard, with all of our family, she almost immediately invited me back into the game as soon as the water works shut down. No matter how ridiculous I was acting or feeling, Jakky always acted as if it didn't mean a thing. To this day, she is my best friend. We openly share opinions, agreeing and disagreeing. I always know that she will have my back, and will always make sure that I am supported no matter what. 

When thinking of the other adults that influenced my childhood, I can't think of many. As a young child, I struggled with emotional regulation, and in turn harbored negative feelings about many people up until very recently. I feel sad that it has taken me so long to see the true intention in their actions, but know that my perceptions are skewed. My mom, for example, always wanted nothing more that to show me love and support. More often than not, I misinterpreted her actions and felt as though she didn't care for me the way she cared for my siblings. As I grow older, I find that I am SO very much like her. Even though we didn't have a strong relationship in the past, I am more than proud to be her daughter. She recently became a Master of Social Work, and wants to dedicate the rest of her like to support others.